Children today carry some heavy burdens.
It’s tough being a child.
Growing up in a world of “always on” technology, untreated mental illness of a parent, increased academic demands, violent television shows/video games, over-emphasized athletic expectations, unhealthy family dynamics, two-earner households, sudden death of a loved one (the list could go on)…
Many children are left to navigate the waters of life with little guidance.
We see this epidemic of troubled youth evidenced by the rise of physical, emotional, and mental disorders of ::
- attention deficit hyperactivity disorder
- oppositional defiant disorder
- conduct disorders
- drug and alcohol abuse issues
- bi-polar disorder
- depression
- eating disorders such as anorexia, bulimia, and/or overconsumption of food
- obsessive-compulsive disorder
- post-traumatic stress disorder
…just to name a few.
Sure, there are those children who seem to thrive in any circumstance and appear to be stable, happy, and secure…but they — unfortunately — are in the minority.
Meanwhile, most of our (our family’s, our neighbor’s, our city’s, our state’s…country’s…world’s) children are struggling with issues that seem so overwhelming to them they not only display physical, emotional, and mental symptoms…but they are pushed into the belief that death provides the only escape.
Hurt.
Anger.
Frustration.
Is there a solution?
I’m not sure.
However, I would beg the argument that a part of the problem is caused by a lack of dirt in their nails, grass between their toes, scraped elbows and bruised knees that has led our children to be labeled “troubled.”
Lord knows I’m not a perfect parent…and for goodness sake, I make mistakes everyday raising these kids of mine.
Yet, I do believe for everything I have done, do, and will do in the future wrong, raising my children here on this ranch– close to the land — in the middle of the Arizona desert is giving them a level of health and happiness unbeknownst to many of their peers.
Children (not just mine, but ALL children) need crave the outdoors.
They need to ::
- connect with nature, life-cycles, and seasonal rhythms.
- engage DAILY in physically strenuous activity.
- make the connection between food and its original source.
- learn how to contribute to the life force of a family.
- discover the power of self-control within the freedom of creativity.
- acquire the knowledge of discipline, hard-work, and “grace under fire” through the modeling (mentorship) of wiser adults whom they respect (a.k.a. Dad, Mom, Uncle, Aunt, Grandpa, Grandma, etc.).
Whether it be in the urban or rural setting — all children need to live close to the land in some way.
My eyes were opened to this truth just yesterday (therefore, I now sit writing these thoughts before they leave me).
The children and I had the opportunity to visit our neighbors earlier in the week.
Dear Lynn, ever so graciously, offered to sell us one of her prize Nigerian Dwarf goats…a freshener who had just weaned twins. (You see, I have been desperate for a goat in milk as our nearly year old little does aren’t quite ready for breeding. Thankfully Lynn was willing to part with Coco!)
Meet Coco…
Anyhow, each child — from 5 to 15 — was bursting with excitement as we all had a quick lesson in hand milking (Okay, in all honesty the two teenage girls initially acted like they were “better than milking a goat,” but once their willingness to try kicked in…they quickly became pros and milked several of the goats at Lynn’s ranch.)
What’s my point of this story? Well, it’s two-fold (more than that really, but I’ll spare you the details) ::
- There’s an incomparable happiness that is found in the connection to nature. I’ll never forget the pure happiness displayed on the faces of my children as they milked our Coco for the first time. They know Coco will provide us with milk that we will use to create sustenance (i.e. butter, cheese, yogurt) and income (i.e. soaps and lotions) for our family…just as the chickens give us eggs and the plants in the garden give us vegetables. Each child has a responsibility in caring for the variety of life on that exists on our ranch.
- We all need someone willing to transfer wisdom. I’m so thankful Lynn was willing to sell Coco and for the time she took to teach us all how to hand milk…that’s stuff ya just can’t get from YouTube!
Transitioning to life on this ranch has taught me many things.
Today, it is that homesteading brings health and happiness to my children.
How has homesteading (urban or rural) brought health and happiness to your children?
Disclaimer: I trust you hear my heart in and between these words. By no means am I judging anyone, nor am I saying “nanny-nanny-boo-boo I’m a better parent than you-you.” I’m just saying that children need to experience life intertwined with nature in some way for their ultimate health & happiness. No matter where you live or how much money you have…you can give your children meaningful connections with the Earth. And that alone has the power to heal a multitude of hurts, fears, and frustrations.
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We didn’t raise our children on a farm but in a suburb of San Diego with no cows, chicken, etc, BUT they played outside all the time. We went to the beach a lot. None of them had their own TV, cell phone, etc. Nowadays, when we take walks around our neighborhood, NO children are playing outside. Developing those large muscle groups with jumping, climbing, running, etc. is so imperative to having healthy, intelligent children. So no matter where you live, try to get your children away from all the technology and move, especially out in the sunshine and grass.
Agreed Lori! I didn’t grow up on a farm either. My parents raised my sister and I in suburbia, but they took us girls camping, hunting, fishing, hiking…you name it! Not to mention we played outside ALL the time in the neighborhood. Times are different for sure, and it’s starting to show.
This is such an essential topic and one that should be a huge incentive for parents of young kids who are just now contemplating the pros and cons of a move to country life. I’m a grandpa now and have had many years to observe the differences is city- and county-raised kids, in my own kids, their kids, other kids in our family, and the children of many friends over the years. The serious problems, behavioral and physiological, that are front focus in the lives of what feels to me to be most of the city kids I know and know of, seem to me to be mostly unheard of in country-raised kids. Sure, there are exceptions, but I’m looking at the big picture here.
Here’s an article that will give you some good food for thought about homsetead kids: http://homesteadinginfo.net/homestead_kids.html
Well said! I grew up playing outside with friends in an average suburban backyard. Weekends, we went to a local state park to hike. This summer, my toddler played outside barefoot while I breastfed her sister in the grass. She helped tend our small garden and used her little rake to garden every day. We had so much fun and it’s such grounding (pun intended) time for our family.
I grew up in small town America. always had to work in the garden and take care of the pets and farm animals we had on a hobby farm. My children grew up in suburbia but still had a garden , pets etc. today they are healthy happy adults who love to go outside and garden etc. not ill. Generations before we didn’t have tvs internet, cell phones and we, my parents , grandparents were not ill.
I worked at and raised my son in a small Christian school. The principal and I became friends and we would often have these discussions as we watched the children play. They would rake the pine needles aside, forming rooms, forts, etc. They would pile the pine needles up and jump and roll in them. Our principal often commented on how healthy this was for them. A few parents and teachers complained that they were getting dirty and that there were lice in the pinestraw. I am very happy my son has grown tall and healthy. Although he will now play his video games for hours if we let him, but he would prefer to be outside with a friend, playing “the imagination game”. Thank you for your article 🙂
I am a mother of 8, 6 of which I have been blessed to raise. ( The other two have been busy being guardian angels). When all of our children were at home we lived in the suburbs but we always had a garden, even if it was just a small one. Getting the kids outside to work was like pulling teeth because ” no one else has to pull weeds” etc. But out they went, whines and all. About 5 years ago we moved to a small country town and bought an acre. It’s not much compared to some folks, but now that all but 2 of mine have left the nest, it’s plenty. They still complain about having to pull weeds, something we grow in abundance, but it’s amazing to see how everyone just “comes down” from life when we are out there working. Sometimes I will notice one of the girls, or one of our grandchildren, just watching the chickens. Sometimes I will find someone out in the greenhouse just sitting. Now when we take trips to “the city”, my girls will talk about how busy everything and everyone are, and when it’s time to go they are ready to get back to the quiet (though busy in it’s own way) life at home. The world of technology is a beautiful gift, but it creates it’s own tragedies if we are not careful. Toes in the grass and dirt on the skin make all the difference! You can wash the dirt off of the outside, but memories will last a lifetime…isn’t it worth the effort to make some good ones?!
YEP – they also crave structure. Getting custody of 4 lil ones (ages 1, 5, 8, and 10) for all of 2008 taught me a lot. A big one was… they’re not the picky eaters parents make them out to be. To this day the youngest loves walking and gardening barefoot (at times) with me and tending to chickens when those types of house sitting opportunities arise. Getting dirty is part of the fun, not to mention good medicine!
Our son, even as young as he is, has always craved being outside and would never stay inside if he didn’t have to. These winter days have been hard with below zero temps because he is ready to get back out there and play in the puddles and dirt! We are so glad that we’ve chosen a homesteading lifestyle for him to grow up in so he can know where his food comes from and learn so many skills that he wouldn’t learn in a city setting. I grew up the same way and am grateful for it.
I witnessed my 15 month old learning to walk faster when I had time off from both school and work. It was a little touch of heaven being with him and teaching him and having quality time. Unfortunately it is not possible for me to homestead my son yet. Hopefully as soon as I am finished with school and some loans I will will have this freedom I seek to be close to my son. Thanks Andrea for posting such wonderful resources for us frugal people 😉
Thanks for sharing. I truly believe that understanding our place in nature allows us to deepen our relationship with ourselves and cultivate our inner strength. Thank you for sharing this powerful post.
Best,
Amita Patel
http://www.AlignedHolistics.com
I’m a teacher as well as a mother of 4. I see everyday that kids do NOT get outside. I can tell by the first snowfall who goes outside to play~they are the kids that can get ready by themselves. My kids are kids that love to garden, gather eggs, can the veggies with me and don’t come in for dinner until the last possible minute! Then I have kids in my class that whine when it’s recess time because “playing outside is boring!” What?!? I’ll take their place….I love being outside. I do believe the same—my kids are not perfect but I have an Eagle Scout, an almost Eagle Scout and 2 Girl Scouts that love to hike, bike, kayak and well just about anything outdoorsy!!!
I bought my first house only two years ago, so my adult son is watching me garden & can/preserve. We lived in an apartment while he was growing up. However, I became a Boy Scout leader (Asst Scoutmaster & Scoutmaster), and we hiked and camped on a regular basis. We also attended nature classes at one of our county parks where we learned about poisonous snakes & plants, how to dye with indigo, how to spin yarn, what animals and plants are indigenous, etc. Even when living in an apartment in this modern age, we can still find ways to connect with nature. Yes, I wish I could’ve afforded a home with yard when my son was young. But this single mom and son still made many happy memories together outdoors, and it was our “best of times.”
I love this. We are looking at some land to buy and have really been talking to the kids about homesteading. My son is 13 and he’s all about it. He loves the outdoors and looks forward to having woods all around him. My daughter, 12, not so much. She is terrified that we won’t have wifi. I believe she’ll get on board when she sees it all for herself. I’m hoping.
We have 5 daughters and though we have always given them “opportunities” to get their hands dirty, the truth is that from my experience, they would rather NOT get grimey. It’s ok if it takes your daughter some time to adjust to the new way of life. Be patient with her occasional tantrums…living off of the land will teach her things that no YouTube video could. Give her a chance to create something beautiful of her own out there…what ever that looks like, once she finds a passion she will let go of the wifi needs! Good Luck!